Vera Don't Need This $#*%!

So, right when we were planning the launch of our next Eligible Bachelors, including a hot doctor no less! - we unceremoniously discovered this:

Yes friends - the unthinkable! WE GOT INSTAGRAM BLOCKED BY @MINDYKALING !!!

At first we were like this: 

BUT THEN we were like this: 

The realization hit - is it not better to be scorned by one's beloved than to waste away in their ignorance of your very existence?!

Leading Lady & the Ex-Factor

I love this American Express commercial starring Mindy:



Remember Mindy, when you got to Hollywood and they said, maybe you should play the best friend or the sidekick, and you thought, "Why can't I be the star? Am I not good enough? ... not pretty enough?"

That's what comes to mind when your ex-boyfriend, with whom you continue to maintain a friendship, B.J. Novak, speaks about your relationship past (while reflecting on your counterparts, Kelly Kapoor and Ryan, on The Office): 

"Says Novak, 'No one, including us, ever really knew, ‘Is this dating? Is this not dating?’ We were never really dating, we were never really not dating. We didn’t know. No one knew.'"

"'I would say it was a great and terrible chemistry, and it reflected what we were like in real life,' Novak said. 'No one ever knew if we were together or not, including us. We weren't always on the same page on a given day or a given hour. We fought a lot. We were each other's best friends. We were inseparable and not talking to each other, often on the same day. And people didn't know, if she was gone, they would ask me where she was, and vice versa. We were like E.T. and Elliott a little bit.'"*

*For the record, has B.J. Novak watched E.T.? This sounds nothing like E.T. and Elliott's relationship!

This begs the question Mindy... 

Listen girl, we know you love him, and we get that he loves you too, as a good friend... 

but the love you deserve isn't one which begrudgingly accepts your affections, filled with moonlight kisses that seem to cool in the warmth of the sun, creeping in this petty pace from day to day as it defers hugs and shared carrot cake from the Soho House:

The only bike-bound love I hope for you is this:

Even better this:

You deserve in love what you demanded in your career - to not settle for less than being the Leading Lady.

Roller Derby King Olly and Queen Mindy

Bachelor Number 2 Olly's alternative dream date with Mindy:

Bachelor #2's (not creepy) "Mindy" Toy

Couples who play together stay together?

She's a doctor too!

Bachelor Number 2 - Oh Olly!

Move over Hugh, Colin, Prince Harry (though we love our gingers!)... there's a new British invader looking to conquer and colonize Mindy's heart (but in a civilized fashion with the best of intentions).

Here's Olly!


Doesn't he sound just darling? With a British accent, there's even a certain elegance to "super snake." 

VITAL STATS:
Location: near London town, UK
Age - 38
Height - 6'3"
Weight - 190 lbs
Occupation - Full-Time Transport Coordinator (and Part-Time Ice Cream Connoisseur)
Zodiac Sign: Taurean who loves Rod Stewart and any Yacht Rock

Why Mindy should date Olly in his own words (this guy is hilarious):

Here are my "credentials" for your perusal (try to remain calm ladies)....

I believe I have all the attributes to sweep Mindy off her feet...

I am a white male - check

I have dark hair and brooding eyes - double check 

and (this is my killer move) I have an English accent, but think Hugh Grant not Austin Powers.

It's the classic Brit boy and Indian American chick romcom!  Our story is practically writing itself!

When I am not at work or eating ice cream (usually both at the same time), I like to volunteer at my local animal shelter, help elderly folks across the road and immerse myself in culture by getting down with some Shakespeare at the theatre.

WHEN Mindy steps of her private jet at London Heathrow she can be assured that I will be waiting to whisk her off on a magical first date that would include (but not limited to) a luncheon appointment with Her Majesty the Queen, a trip to Hogwarts to take in a Quidditch tournament, some sight seeing around Notting Hill and to round the day off we would head to that most classic location of all 'boy meets girl' movies - the ice rink, where any discomfort that Mindy felt would melt away the instant she felt my strong arms around her whisking her around the ice like a figure skating God.  

Adding a pic as requested:
One of me enjoying my passion:

Another of me trying to enjoy my country retreat - get off my land you terrible people).

Once again, I thank you for bringing Mindy and I closer together.

Olly

Instagram @green_nowhere

Our Overall "ManforMindy" Assessment
He's fun, he's funny and he's as delectable as the chocolates and ice creams with which he'd woo you.
But whether it's Pat Benatar or Mariah featuring Jay-Z singing it, this one's got heartbreaker written all over him!

Special thanks to our American emissary who endorsed this eligible suitor! - @cheyannejo

Don't Be Afraid Bachelor #2!

We hope this disturbing Youtube footage doesn't disturb our soon to be announced international bachelor!



Not everyone in America is a raging monster.

Hopefully this makes you feel better!

"Land of the Free and home of the Kaling" - @cheyannejo (Instagram)

Stay Tuned For Bachelor #2!

We hope Mindy don't mind a working class lover!